SBL Notebook, Week 5

And then, depression set in. So said Bill Murray in “Stripes” (or was it “Caddyshack?” . . . No, definitely “Stripes” . . . But jeez, when are we going to stop falling back on these silly movie quotes in the Notebook every week?) -– and so it was for offense in the SBL this week. The depression in this case was more like a trough, into which tumbled the relatively robust hitting numbers we’d seen in recent weeks. In their place were stats so tiny in some cases, you’d almost have thought it was All-Star week. Oh, there were a couple of exceptions, which we’ll dispense with right away: Derek’s Derelicts continued on the offensive tear they’d begun last week, walloping 18 HRs and collecting 40 RBIs, 36 TB and a .388 OBP. And Paulo’s Zero’s kept the power turned on with 12 HRs, after blasting 19 in Week 4. But that was it for noteworthy numbers. While the D’s and Z’s were combining for 30 homers, the other 10 teams combined for 59, and puny average of 5.9 per team (yes, we figured that out all by ourselves). Nobody but the Derelictables reached 40 RBIs (league average for everyone not named Derek: 29), no one could top his 36 TB, no one had more than 37 runs . . . you get the picture. It was the kind of week in which Mikee’s Moaners could “complement” their usual sturdy pitching with microscopic, (dare we say?) depressing o-stats across the board (31 runs, 26 TB, 6 HRs, 27 RBIs, 2 SBs, .272 OBP) and still post three 9-2 blowout victories -– part of a 4-3 week that actually lifted the M’s back into first place, a game ahead of displaced penthouse occupants Bristow’s Batfaced Girls, in the Great Mediocrity that is the American division. The AL race has devolved into quite the unremarkable mess, with no team able to distinguish itself, the top five separated by a mere four games. Three different teams have held first place in five weeks, and none has stayed there for longer than one week. The real power is in the National division, home of not only the mashin’ Derelicts but also the celebrated BTIB, the Patton Inmates, who enhanced their reputation with a 7-0 week that took their record to a sparkling 27-5, six games up on the smokin’-hot D-Train. More to the point, the NL won eight of 12 interleague games in this seven-game week, after going 9-3 the previous two weeks. Do we spy a trend here?